example essay

Sibling Rivalry

Gabriele, Travis and Mitchell could be the poster children for sibling rivalry.

During the time right after Gabriele’s brothers were born, she adored them and being

three years older she settled into the “big sister” role fairly easily. She always wanted to

give them a bottle, change their clothes and rock them. Everything was great until Travis

was about three years old and Mitchell was about two years old. This is when the sibling

rivalry “tug of war” began.

Gabriele, Travis and Mitchell are not different from any other siblings, the rivalry

is part of daily life. In the early preschool and elementary years the rivalry was as simple

as who was going to be “the banker” in a game of Monopoly or which chair each of them

would sit in to watch TV. Gabriele being the oldest always thought she should get to be

“the banker” and of course, Travis being the oldest boy thought it should be his job to be

“the banker”. Taking turns was an option but that lead to more rivalry because they were

never happy with how the other one was doing it. I usually ended up sitting on the floor

with them doing the banker’s job. When the rivalry would start about which chair each of

them sat in while watching TV, it was the same as the Monopoly game except they were

the ones who ended up sitting on the floor.

Travis and Mitchell being only 14 months apart always had the rivalry going on,

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usually over toy trucks, cars and/or blocks. Each of them taking a truck from the other

ones pile or knocking over the other ones fort they had built out of the blocks. Gabriele

and Mitchell had very few rivalry moments because she still thought of him as “the baby”

or “her baby” and he usually got his way, until it was time to take a trip in the car. The

rivalry would begin as we walked out the door with all of them shouting, “I have

shotgun” which meant they wanted to sit in the front seat.

As they all got older the sibling rivalry was still present but on a new level. When

Gabriele started driving and had a curfew, her favorite statement was “I bet Travis and

Mitchell won’t have to be home this early” or “Travis and Mitchell are going to get to go

where ever they want”. Now that Travis is driving, his favorite thing to bring up is that

Gabriele did not have to call and check in when she started driving or she had a better car

than he does. Travis and Mitchell now rival about who is going to take out the trash,

who is going to cut the grass or who has the coolest friends. Gabriele still considers

Mitchell as “the baby” and he still gets his way with her most of the time.

Rivalry between siblings is not a “new” concept it has been around since the

beginning of time, Cain and Abel to be exact. Unlike everything else, it has not changed

much, sibling rivalry still exists all you need are the siblings. The age and/or gender of

the siblings does not really make the rivalry better or worse, two or more brothers, two or

more sisters or a brother and a sister, it is all the same. With more then two siblings all of

them may not have a rivalry. It may be that they rival with one sibling but not all of them.

As a parent of siblings I have often made the statement, “I wish I could find a cure

for sibling rivalry and bottle it, I could make a fortune”. But I also like to think of sibling

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rivalry as competition. Competition has been labeled as a “good thing”, but in reality

competition is a necessity, just as sibling rivalry is a necessity. To get attention, to find

their place in the home, to build individual personalities and because it is plain human

nature are various reasons why we have sibling rivalry.